Avengers: Age of Ultron (Heck Yeah!)

*Warning: The following post contains multiple spoilers.*

I just got back from Avengers: Age of Ultron. 

Yeah. That's right. The movie I raved about before it even hit theaters. The movie I've been waiting months for. The movie I was so excited for.

Was it all I hoped and dreamed it would be?

To an extent, yes.

Age of Ultron was good. It had its great moments, and I'd say it lived up to the first Avengers film. But it had its downsides, too... and I guess that's what I'm here to talk about. And believe me, I've got a lot to talk about. So get up, grab a tasty beverage, use the bathroom, and find a comfy seat, 'cause this is going to be a long post.

***

Age of Ultron: The Good

• The action scenes were amazing--but then, I suppose that's par for the course with a Marvel movie. From the Hulk to Scarlet Witch, those scenes were beautifully animated and great the watch. I wish Quicksilver had gotten more scenes, but overall it was awesome. 
• Ultron and the Vision were both very well-characterized. It was really highlighted that Ultron had all of Tony Stark's flaws and none of his qualities, and the Vision felt--poignant. Clear. And the extremely human-like AI of both characters kept them very interesting, moreso than the usual robot characters you find in sci-fi.
• The dialogue was, as with the previous movie, quite entertaining. The "language" running gag was particularly great. 
• Speaking of dialogue, I just loved the pep talk that Hawkeye gave to Scarlet Witch during the final battle. It ranged from inspiring ("You stay in here, you're good, I'll send your brother back for you... but if you step outside, then you fight and you fight to the death...") to hilarious and very on-point ("We're fighting robots. In a flying city. And I've got a bow and arrow. None of this makes sense!"). It was just... beautiful... and I really loved it. 
• I was thrilled to see War Machine and Maria Hill as a part of the Avengers. Though I really, really wish that the Falcon could've gotten more than one appearance during the party... why didn't he stay?
• And on that note, I loved the bit at the end implying that the Avengers will now include the Vision, Scarlet Witch, and War Machine. 
• I did like Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver, too... but more on them later. 
• And Dr. Helen Cho. I loved her, and I'm so glad she's not dead. Hopefully she'll be in later installments, because she was great and somewhat-underutilised character. 
• The fact that the Avengers were desperately trying to save civilian lives was a fantastic touch; a good counterbalance to the obvious death and destruction that was all around. 
• And I enjoyed seeing Hawkeye's family... but again, more on that later. 

Age of Ultron: The Bad

• I liked Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver, I really did. They were fun to watch and they were pretty well characterized. But... I don't feel that they were as well done as they could have been.
  For one thing, Wanda and Pietro Maximoff were Jewish and Romani in the comics. That doesn't seem to have carried over to the movie universe; there was nothing that might have indicated that they were anything other than Eastern European and white. (Elizabeth Olsen and Aaron Taylor-Johnson, the actors in these roles, are both white, though Taylor-Johnson is, apparently, Jewish.) 
• I'm still mad about the apparent erasure of Hawkeye's deafness. In the comics he is (was? I'm pretty sure he is) 80% deaf. In the movies, nope, apparently he's 100% able-bodied and able to hear. And that irks me. The reveal that he does have a family, that he's got this sort of other life... that could've been the perfect place to show him practicing sign language with his kids, or something... anything. But no. There was nothing, and at this point, this far into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I'm starting to resign myself to the fact that we aren't going to get 80% deaf Clint Barton. 
• Okay, this point right here is long and complicated and somewhat spoilery, so if you feel like skipping it... actually, don't skip it, because I think this is important.
  Awhile back I did a review of Bramblestar's Storm, one of the more recent installments in the Warriors series. If you've read that review, you'll remember that I was quite disgruntled about the reveal that Squirrelflight really can have kits.
  Well, I never thought that I would see the same problem in a Marvel movie and a Warriors book, but there it is and here we are.
  You see, in this movie there's a blossoming subplot that details a romance between Natasha Romanov (Black Widow) and Bruce Banner (the Hulk, obviously). In one of their scenes, Banner mentions that he wouldn't be able to father children if they were married. Natasha then reveals (in conjunction with a memory/flashback she had earlier) that she was forcibly sterilized as part of her training--that she physically cannot have children, either. She then asks Bruce, "Still think you're the only monster on the team?"--implying that she is a monster... because she can't have children.
  I don't like the implications here.
  Watching the scene, I got the feeling that Natasha Romanov has seen herself as monster for a long time; because of all that she's gone through and all that she's done. But the highlight in this scene--and, indeed, in her flashback--was the sterilization. In this scene, there is a very real implication that because she cannot have children, Natasha considers herself a monster.
  And I don't like that.
  As I stated in the Bramblestar's Storm review, there are women all over the world who can't have children, for one reason or another. Not only is this insulting and dismissive towards them, it's basically saying that real women who have been forcibly sterilized are, if not monsters, then something unnatural. That's not right. And while Age of Ultron doesn't outright equate children with a happy, loving marriage (the way Bramblestar's Storm did), the implications behind this scene are not good. 
• I kind of feel that Helen Cho was shoved aside and not allowed to play a huge part in the plot. Don't get me wrong; I was thrilled with her character, and honestly she had a bigger role to play than I thought she would. But then she was brainwashed by Ultron. And (literally) shoved to the side so that he could head out and enact his plans. And wounded so she couldn't help the Avengers anymore. (On the one hand, I was so scared she would die, and I'm thrilled she didn't, but really. I'm seriously hoping she comes back and does more in later movies.)

***

Conclusion

I really, really liked Avengers: Age of Ultron, for all the reasons listed. It had action, it had humor (Maria Hill's "*cough*Testosterone*cough*" comment...), the plot was pretty good, Ultron was well characterized...

And yet. 

And yet Wanda and Pietro Maximoff had their race (apparently) changed, for no reason that I can see. And yet Joss Whedon (the writer of this film) is still ignoring Hawkeye's disability. And yet Helen Cho was pushed to the side to make room for Ultron and Vision and Thor and Quicksilver's death. And yet Natasha is called--calls herself--a monster for having been sterilized. 

Avengers: Age of Ultron is a good movie--maybe even a great one, in terms of entertainment value and fun. But it had its flaws. And for those, I give it three and a half stars out of five. 

I like the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I really do. And for that reason, I hope that the movies will only improve from here. For they have their flaws and their failings. But then--as the Vision tells Ultron in the film--perhaps there is grace in their failings. For that, I can always hope. 

All the Small Things

~Periodic ramblings about my life.~

***

1. (Hydrogen)

I'm more-or-less halfway through Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. It's my first time reading it. (I started the series later than most.) I know all the spoilers, though, because it's pretty much impossible to be on the internet and not run into spoilers about this series. 

2. (Helium)

We are having a really strange winter. I'm currently living in Alaska, and our snowfall this year has to be at a record low. We got a few inches just recently, but before that there was only about an inch on the ground, and that was starting to melt. 

I just hope this doesn't ruin breakup. See, there's this huge ditch in our neighborhood that fills up with water when the snow melts, since it's at the bottom of the hill our neighborhood is situated on. The water generally only stays for a few days, but it's fun while it lasts. Or, it will be if our abysmal snowfall rates don't affect it. 

3. (Lithium)

I am really excited about the superhero movies coming out this year (specifically, Avengers: Age of Ultron, Ant-Man, and the new Fantastic Four movie). I'm especially excited to see what Fox does with the Fantastic Four this time around, since their first stab at it wasn't exactly... stellar. 

4. (Beryllium)

You're probably wondering why each of these thoughts is preceded by the name of a chemical. I'm just going to come right out: it's a pun. Periodic, get it? Because at the beginning I sub-titled it Periodic Thoughts About My Life? Heheheheheh.... heh. 

5. (Boron)

My sister is reading Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. (She's actually reading it here as I type this.) I keep threatening to spoil it for her. Fortunately, she has no idea what's coming. 

Heheheheheheheheh. Heheheheheheheh--

Excuse me. 

6. (Carbon)

Season 5 of Downton Abbey is taking forever to air. We get one episode a week, every Sunday night. And, you know, that wouldn't sting so much if the UK hadn't already gotten the entire season before we even got the premiere!

Sorry. But I am still a little bitter about that one. It just isn't fair. 

7. (Nitrogen) 

We're still working our way through season 1 of Agents of SHIELD. The episodes are getting a bit creepier, and much more frustrating, but at this point there's no way we're going to stop watching. 

8. (Oxygen)

I've started the second semester of Challenge B (the homeschool program I do). It's definitely tough, but I'm starting to enjoy it a little bit (a little bit) more. Fortunately, spring break is March 2-6. And we might be taking a hop to Germany in a couple weeks to visit some friends. So that'll be fun, assuming it happens (it's still up in the air right now). 

***

And that about wraps up my periodic reminisces about my life. (Periodic. Heheheh.) For more information about the Periodic Table, I recommend the awesome book The Elements: A Visual Explanation of Every Known Atom in the Universe, by Theodore Gray. For more about my life, keep reading this blog. 

Bye, and thanks for reading!

The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies

*Warning: The following post contains unmarked spoilers for both book and movie. Viewer discretion is advised.*

So, I recently went to see The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies, the final installment in the Hobbit movie trilogy, and Peter Jackson's final movie set in Middle-Earth (at least to date). It was reasonably good, I suppose, and there were things about it I enjoyed; but there were also disappointing moments. I will detail my thoughts (concerning both this movie and all the movies in general) below,

***

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Enjoyment

• I went into this movie with my expectations vastly lowered from where they were going into The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug. Therefore, I did manage to enjoy most of it. 
• Case in point: the portrayal of Thorin slowly losing himself to greed and 'dragon-sickness' after reconquering Erebor. Richard Armitage's acting is amazing, and the moments between him and Bilbo (Martin Freeman) are amazing to watch. I also think the portrayal of the other dwarves' positions was well done--they want to be loyal, because that's what's gotten them this far, but it's increasingly hard to be loyal to someone so selfish. 
• Bard was, again, a favorite character (though he still doesn't quite match the character I imagined when reading the book). His daughters had less screentime, I think, than in Desolation of Smaug, but his son Bain had some more scenes, and I loved that. 
• The visuals were amazing, but then, this is Peter Jackson's Middle-Earth we're talking about here, so yeah. 

The Hobbit: Desolation of Jackson

• As with Desolation of Smaug (and, to an extent, An Unexpected Journey), there were several deviations from the book here, though overall it was rather accurate. According to Middle-Earth history, Azog the Defiler really shouldn't be alive in the time this movie takes place, but that's been a problem since the first movie. Angmar wasn't involved in the book, and neither was Sauron really, and there really weren't all that many orcs present at the Battle of Five Armies, but oh well. Orcs, whattcha gonna do. 
• My biggest problem with this movie was probably the death scenes (for Thorin, Fili, and Kili). This kind of ties in with the portrayal of the battle in general, so please forgive me for being a bit long-winded.
  When reading the book, I always imagined the battle as taking place in front of Erebor, and only in front of Erebor. Sure, there was Ravenhill, but that wasn't very far up or far away from the main battle. I definitely didn't envision a cliff that far removed from the battle.
  Consequently, I always imagined Thorin, Fili, and Kili going down in battle together. Perhaps Thorin would fall, Fili and Kili would swoop to defend their uncle, and they would all die together. Or Fili and Kili would die trying to protect each other, because they're brothers, they've been together forever, and there is nothing they would not do to protect each other.
  But this is not how things happened in the movie.
  To make a long story short, Thorin, Fili, and Kili (along with Dwalin) leave the main battle and head up Ravenhill (or shall I say, Ravencliff) to try and kill the orcs' leader(s). Fili and Kili get sent out scouting, and then are surrounded when orcish reinforcements arrive. They get separated, and then they and Thorin are essentially picked off one by one.
  What the ever-loving fudge, Peter Jackson? I mean, come on! Fili didn't even get a chance to fight before the orcs killed him! And sure, Kili saw him die and tried to have a roaring rampage of revenge and stuff. But come on, they've been this heartwarming pair since the first movie and you're not even going to let them die together? That aside, you're not even going to let Fili, heir to the throne of Erebor and Thorin Oakenshield's nephew, have a fighting chance before he dies?
• And then naturally Tauriel shows up. Look, I'm sorry about this, Tauriel, I really am. I wanted to like you. I overlooked your less-than-original relationships with Kili and Legolas all through Desolation of Smaug. I reveled in your action scenes and tried to forget what I didn't like about you. But after that death scene with Kili and Thranduil, I am done. 
  (See? Peter Jackson can't even get me to like a character that I wanted to like.)
• Finally, I feel like the titular battle was far too drawn out. I get that it was an integral part of the movie and junk, and sure the action was fun to watch, but eventually it gets to the point where you're just wondering when it's going to end. 

The Hobbit: There and Back Again

• I'm... not really sure how to feel about the Hobbit movie trilogy. On the one hand, there are--were--things I wanted to see in movie format. I was excited about the scene at the beginning of Desolation of Smaug, where Thorin and Gandalf first meet. I was happy to see all thirteen of the dwarves in the company fleshed out and represented. And of course, the visual shots are amazing, the action is fun to watch, and there's a decent bit of humor here and there too. 
• But then there are the downsides. And there are quite a few downsides--most likely enough to outweigh the good.
  To begin with, there are the chronological errors. My biggest problem with the series at this point is that Azog the Defiler is still alive. According to Middle-Earth history, Azog was killed at the Battle of Anulzibzar Moria by Dain, Thorin's cousin. Azog's son Bolg--who also appears in the movie trilogy--was the one who spearheaded the orcish attacks, because Azog was, y'know, dead at the time. So here we have Peter Jackson messing up history on two accounts--one, Azog should've died at Moria, and two, it should've been Dain that killed him.
• The whole Necromancer/Sauron subplot--which I have complained about before--was not, as I originally thought, wholly fabricated by Jackson. The White Council did, in fact, drive Sauron out of Dol Guldor and into the Mordor area, in the same year that Erebor was retaken. However, this doesn't mean I'm willing to let the matter pass. I do not think that such a storyline should have been included in the Hobbit movies, particularly when it had nothing to do with any of the main characters. The only thread connecting that story to the main one was Radaghast, and it was a tenuous thread indeed--since Radaghast wasn't involved in The Hobbit to begin with. 
• My final main point about this series was Tauriel. As stated above, I wanted to like Tauriel. I really did. But with all that happened in the movies, I couldn't. I'm not sure if it was the screenwriter's fault, or Mr. Jackson's, or both, but I just don't feel like Tauriel brought anything new to the table in terms of... well, anything. Yes, she was action-y. So was literally everybody else. Yes, she provided romance. I wasn't particularly looking for romance in these movies, not gonna lie. And really, when it comes down to it, I just didn't feel too much personality from Tauriel. Which is a shame, because I wanted to like her. 

Conclusion

Well, this concludes my reviews of the Hobbit trilogy (much as Battle of the Five Armies concluded Jackson's Tolkien movies). We've been through the good, the bad, and the ugly, and if you've stayed with me this far, thank you. I appreciate that. 

Ah, well. I'd better not get too sentimental. I've still got plenty of things to obsess over and talk about on my blog. And with school coming up fast (faster than I'd like), there's that, too. 

So. I'm giving the Hobbit trilogy three stars out of five, for the sake of things. 

And that's the end of that. 

I Really Need To Stop Doing This

I honestly don't know why I do this to myself. Maybe it's because I'm a writer, and thus have an inexorable drive to make up stories out of thin air. Maybe it's just because I subscribe to the old mantra: if one is good, two must be even better, right?

Either way, I really probably should stop doing this. But I can't. And thus...

I am probably doomed to continue making weird, unlikely crossovers.

For those who don't know, a crossover is basically a fusion of two stories. Some crossovers happen naturally--when the stories are similar (i.e. Star Trek and Star Wars) or when they take place in the same universe (Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit). But then there are those crossovers that... don't.

Those are the types of crossovers I like to create.

You know, I once mapped out a very long, complex crossover of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and the Horatio Hornblower series. I never wrote any of it down, of course, and now I couldn't tell you who was who or what was what. But at the time I was in love with my ideas and though they were the best thing since sliced cheese.

Then there's the thing I've been playing with recently.

You see, my sister and I recently been watching two shows: one with my mom, and one with my dad. Those two shows happen to be Downton Abbey and Agents of SHIELD, respectively. We're two episodes into Agents of SHIELD and two seasons into Downton Abbey, but I really like both.

The trouble is that now my urge to crossover is starting in.

My sister doesn't want to discuss these crossover ideas with me, despite having seen both shows. I'm a little torn myself over whether these ideas are genius or just nutty. And even if I did write them down it would largely be for my benefit and mine alone.

But I am sure of one thing. I am not going to repeat the mistake I made with My Little Pony and the Hornblower series. This time, I am at least going to write my ideas down, if only so that I can look back at them later and laugh at myself.

I haven't quite gotten the details all worked out yet, as it were. But you can be sure that as soon as I do, I'll post them, and you can laugh as much as you want.

(Assuming you watch both shows and get all the parallels. I don't know, I might be the only one.)