Friday, March 22, 2013

...And Then I Was Attacked By a Pine Tree

Ack! Help! Call the Riders of Rohan,
I'm being attacked by an Ent!
I love sledding. So do my sister and brother. Fortunately for us, we live in Alaska, and there's a small hill in our front yard where we can sled when it snows (which is often). The way we sled, though, you'd think we were getting bored. We have come up with many variations on sledding. For example...
  • There's 'surfing', where we sled down the hill while standing up on the sled. (This is popular with my brother, who now calls it 'snowboarding'.)
  • There's 'skiing' where we sled down, while standing up, with two sleds, one for each foot. (Fortunately, this has only actually been attempted once.)
  • There's hold-my-hand, as we call it, where two people sled down side-by-side, while holding hands. (This is a particular favorite.)
  • There's 'hold-my-hand-while-standing-up'. This consists of the normal hold-my-hand procedure. One difference: a third person is standing behind the two sledders, with one foot on each sled. (This is a rarer variety.)
  • Lastly, there's three-person sledding (three people to one sled) and the extremely rare four-person sledding (four people to one sled; this has only been attempted once, since there are only three children in my family).
So, yeah. Now that I think about it, it's pretty much a miracle that none of us has gotten seriously hurt while sledding.
But wait--someone has gotten hurt while sledding. Wait for a moment, and you'll see what I mean...

It all started innocently enough. Mom had scheduled a playdate with some close friends of ours. Our friends were going to introduce us to one of their absolute favorite sledding hills. Us being the junior sled fanatics that we were, we decided to go. What could go wrong, right? If only we had known...
One twenty- or thirty-minute drive later, we arrived at the hill... and found that it was way bigger than we'd thought.
Mom? I'm starting to have second
thoughts about this...
Well, there was no going back now. Out of the car we went. My sister and I grabbed a sled and started toward the hill.
The walk to the top of the hill should've clued us in on the danger. We were constantly on edge, as the hill was very steep and very slippery. But we pressed on, and eventually reached the top...
...where my sister immediately decided that no, we needed to get to the top of that hill... that hill over there... because it was required that we get the maximum thrill available. So, grudgingly, I agreed, and we started up a narrow, icy path to the top of a higher hill just next to us.
Well, after a short walk, we reached the top of the new hill. We got on the sled, at which point I began having second thoughts. However, my sister wouldn't let me back out. So we pushed... and pulled... and
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
That was our general reaction to the drop we experienced. But really, all was going well. We whipped past a couple patches of reeds on the hill, and then sort-of realized that we were close to the bottom.
Then it happened.
Somehow, the front of the sled caught in a rut on the side of the hill. One minute we were speeding along like normal, and the next, BAM! We went flying head-over-heels and landed in a heap at the bottom of the hill.
My sister popped up, completely fine. In fact, she wanted to do it again. Me? Not so much.
I had landed on top of my sister and face-planted into the back of her leg. One side of my face was numb, and I was bordering on a puffy lip. My legs had also gotten twisted around during the landing and now felt very weak. Amazingly, however, I had no serious injuries.
I tried sledding the hill a few more times, but eventually decided to sit it out. I just couldn't handle the fear of the hill.
Well, that sort of ruined me for big hills. But I'm still completely fine with sledding on the little hill in our front yard. Which leads me to the topic that inspired my title...

One fine, snowy day, my siblings and I were out sledding in our yard. We had started playing this new game: as we sledded down the hill, we would call out the name of a favorite book/movie character.
Of course, characters from LOTR and The Hobbit were immediately up for grabs. But I, being the Warriors nerd that I am, decided to do Warriors characters as well. I was about to leap down the hill while shouting the name of a favorite character (Bluestar ftw!) when I walked straight into a pine tree branch.

Yeah, this isn't exactly the best view when
you're trying to sled.
Well, I was completely fine. But it sort of ended me calling our Warriors characters.

What's really funny is the conversation my sister and I had about it later:

Me: ...AND THEN I WAS ATTACKED BY A PINE TREE.
Crista: You were not attacked by a palm tree.
Me: I said pine. AND YES I WAS.
Crista: No you weren't.
Me: It whacked me right in the face! Knocked my glasses right off.
Crista: It did not, you attacked it, so it acted in self-defense.
Me: I did not attack that poor innocent pine tree! It attacked me.
Crista: Well, obviously, it thought you were attacking it, and it acted in self-defense.
Yeah, we're quirky like that.

Of course, ask me tell either of these stories now, and I'll deny that they ever happened. This is my current version of the sledding accident story...

Alright, so I was with my sister sledding on a nice, sizable sledding hill. We were alternating between the highest hill and the second highest hill.
Well, eventually we decided to try going together. We climbed up to the crest of the highest hill, got on the sled, and leapt down.
Things were going well. We were near the bottom of the hill when it happened, thought. Were passing through a patch of grass when BAM! A group of karpoi [grain spirits from Greek mythology] attacked us and overturned the sled! Crista got away, but the karpoi picked me up and transported me far, far away--all the way to the Clans' lake territories! There the karpoi left me. Of course, a ShadowClan patrol came along right them. They attacked me, naturally, and I was forced to defend myself. They gave me enough scratches for me to feel, but not enough to seriously injure me. I leapt up, hitched a ride on Blackjack the pegasus, and flew back to the hill. There I kept right on sledding until we had to go home.

So, yeah. There's my version of the story. So... what are your thought on sledding, accidents, and pine trees?